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Post by Kieran Michael Dawn on Jul 14, 2012 19:09:40 GMT -5
He had to remind himself again that she was a vampire, a soulless creature that had killed many people... probably more people than he'd treated in all the time he'd been a healer. But looking at her right now, she seemed... fragile. Innocent. Almost human.
'Yes, he's gone for now," Kieran replied evenly. "Why did you want me to come back? Did you need something else? You're not still in pain, are you?"
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Post by Kryshna on Jul 29, 2012 18:10:04 GMT -5
"They will take me... Punish me?"
Her eyes look into his, fearful of what will happen next to her.
"Angry, the German. Feared my words..."
She could barely keep her eyes open any longer. Her words began to get jumbled and confused, mixing Arabic with english. She remained knelt at the edge of the sunlight.
"sleep..."
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Post by Kieran Michael Dawn on Jul 31, 2012 23:34:57 GMT -5
He couldn't help her now. He had a feeling she knew that just as well as he did. Maybe this was her way of saying goodbye.
"I don't think they're going to kill you," he said. It was the only thing he could tell her that he was sure about. If they'd wanted her dead, they wouldn't have brought her here to be healed. "But yes, they probably will punish you. They probably are going to lock you up somewhere and never let you out."
That, he realized, was probably the worst punishment they could come up with for her. Unless they killed her, she wouldn't die. She'd be imprisoned forever. It shouldn't have made him sad, but it did.
"What did you say to the German? I could hear him yelling and throwing things."
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Post by Kryshna on Sept 3, 2012 16:13:52 GMT -5
"German and I... similar... If he does not change... will be killer like me. He did not want to hear. Yelled, threw chair..."
She lay on the ground, curled up and watched him. Her finger tips touched the edge of the sunlight then pulled back, feeling the burning. She was scared, for the first time in a long time. Scared that they would toss her into a pit and never let her out. They would keep her weak so she could not break out.
A single blood drop fell from her eyes onto the concrete floor.
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Post by Kieran Michael Dawn on Sept 6, 2012 23:24:27 GMT -5
Kieran didn't know what to say to that. On the surface, he couldn't imagine any two beings that were less alike than Kryshna and the German Auror. Kryshna seemed barely in control... rather like a caged tiger that had been beaten. She was wounded and weak and humbled, but inside she was still fierce and defiant, waiting patiently for her chance at revenge. Although Kieran didn't have much experience with the auror, he seemed rather... uptight. He seemed like a man who wanted things just so and couldn't tolerate any deviations. But maybe that control was more fragile than it seemed, and underneath the shell was someone fierce and full of rage. Kieran didn't know, but he wasn't sure it mattered to him.
"I think... I'm more like you than he is. Sometimes I feel like I'm losing my grip on reality... on everything. I've felt anger and rage so powerful, I feared I might hurt someone. But what you do... it isn't out of rage, is it? Do you feel anything at all?"
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Post by Kryshna on Sept 7, 2012 2:02:04 GMT -5
Rage, she knew. Kryshna was much more in control that Keiran might believe. The art of assassinations took precision, control and concentration. Yes, she had the beast in her. It could lash out at any second, uncontrolled and violent. But when she worked, the killing machine had to be controlled, focused at a single target and perfectly placed to allow the most precise technique. But eventually, the beast would always get the upper hand.
She remembered one time that she had gone so long without feeding that she had lost control. The Dark Lord figured that she could be trained like a falcon or a hunting dog. Keep it hungry then point it at a target. But that had gone wrong. The handler that was suppose to apparate her to the target, as soon as he had stepped in the door, had been ripped to shreds.
But it was all built up from knowing she had failed her clan. She had not been there during the attack. All of them, every single one in the mountain had been killed. But she was away on a mission. Had not been their during the attack and could do nothing to stop it. She had dreamt of it. Had watched all of her clan-mates die in the attack. Rage was something she knew very well.
"Rage... pain... guilt. Failure, I know. Know feelings don't know words for. Loss. I kill. Was raised, trained to kill, is instinct to kill. But rage? Feel it every day, like poison."
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Post by Kieran Michael Dawn on Oct 11, 2012 0:00:18 GMT -5
Rage was a poison. It had infected him the day he lost his father, his sister, and his fiancee in the attack at Hogsmeade. It ate away at his insides, killing all that was good and positive and hopeful inside of him. Slowly he was dying inside. And the only way he could think of to combat the process was alcohol. It numbed the pain, the emotions, the rage. But it, to, was eating away at him little by little. If he kept on this path, it was only a question of which would give out first--his body or his soul.
"How do you deal with it? The rage? How do you manage to keep in control when you need to?"
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Post by Kryshna on Oct 13, 2012 21:06:33 GMT -5
"Goals keep controlled. Focus, control, missions. Rage not evil, just instinct. Humans put leash on rage, on instinct. Push it away, try not think about it. But Rage always shows through. Can not be controlled. Only put aside at times. Discipline controls it."
She looks up at the shadows.
"Was told once other emotions keep away. People help?" She shakes her head. "Have only known once. Was young though."
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Post by Kieran Michael Dawn on Oct 18, 2012 23:46:51 GMT -5
Kieran only understood about half of what she said. He understood the overall idea of what she was saying, but her disjointed English was not easy to follow. But what he understood was that his current method of coping wasn't working. He had no control over anything, not even his own pain. He was numbing it with alcohol, and when he wasn't drinking, the pain threatened to crush him. This night was the first time he'd been able to remain sober without feeling the avalanche of emotions threatening to bury him. And he owed it all to her.
He couldn't even explain why she fascinated him so, and he knew it probably was unhealthy. She represented life and death, the whole cycle of life in one. She was darkness, representing the beast within all humans, and yet she herself was no longer human. But on the outside, she appeared almost innocent. She knew death, but knew nothing of pain or love. In a way, he almost envied her that.
"How do you want me to help you?"
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Post by Kryshna on Oct 21, 2012 16:50:11 GMT -5
She was very clear with her next statement, looking him in the eyes.
"Tell no one of me."
It was a phrase she had only had to use a few times, for it was rare that someone knew her secrets. It was not just the Death Eaters she had to fear. Other vampires, if they knew she exsisted, might hunt her down for various reasons. They would hunt him down and use him for information, possibly even against her.
She could feel her exhaustion pushing on her. Her energy waned as she looked upon him. Finally, she moved further into the cell and curled up. He could barely see her up against the wall. All that could be seen was her eyes refracting the light back towards him, like a cat. But even those disappeared after a few seconds as her eyes closed.
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Post by Kieran Michael Dawn on Nov 2, 2012 0:04:06 GMT -5
And who would he tell? He'd shut out most of the people who cared about him--those that were still alive, that was. The few people he was still talking to--Chase, his mother--they wouldn't understand. They had no idea what was going through his head right now, and they would never understand his fascination with this creature. They'd warn him away from her, they'd think he'd gone mad. Maybe he had.
It didn't even occur to him that she was referring to the death eaters or other vampires. He had such hatred for the death eaters as it was that if he had encountered any of them, there wouldn't have been time to ask questions.... he would have fought them, knowing full well that they'd kill him.
"Of course not," he said faintly. What else was there to say?
He watched as she shifted position, far back enough against the wall to avoid the shaft of light spilling through the enchanted window. He stayed still, watching her drift into sleep. Strange how even her immortal form needed sleep.
Finally, he got up and, with one final look back at her, left the room. He didn't expect he'd ever see her again, but he knew he'd never forget her.
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