Settling In (Maggie)

[Vanessa VanRyan]

Maggie O'Neil

Vanessa had just finished a set and as the crowd applauded she thanked them with a smile before stepping off stage and making her way to the back room to change.

Everything was perfect, she had really settled into her life here. Singing at Stu's, living with Derek, she was even making friends, and though she was far from having any sort of romantic interest, she did find herself enjoying the flirtations of a few of the customers.

She changed into work clothes and headed back out to the bar ready to earn an actual living. She approached her first table, "Hi Hun, what can I get you?"

[Maggie O'Neil]

After her last experience in one of the local pubs, Maggie was understandably hesitant. She had always preferred the little clubs in Paris--the piano bars and music halls that were less about drinking and more about just having fun and listening to good music. She had already found that Spellbound was not to her liking--she had barely lasted 10 minutes in there. Stu's might have just been a karaoke bar, but it at least had a quiet, sleepy quality to it, and she was fairly certain that at least here she wouldn't be groped by anyone.

She had almost passed the place by, after looking at the front of it. But hearing the beautiful singing coming from inside the club, she had been compelled to enter. This was what she wanted--just a chance to hear some good music and relax a little bit. She caught most of Vanessa's set, allowing herself to feel transported to a sleepy music hall back in Paris, where this woman would easily fit right in.

She was disappointed when the set ended, but she decided to linger a while to see if any other singers stepped up to the stage. So when the singer she had just watched walked up to take her drink order, she was a little surprised.

"Oh, I'll just have a butterbeer," she said. "Can I just say--you were really good. I caught your whole set... you have a great voice."

[Vanessa VanRyan]

"Huh?" Vanessa asked confused, "Oh, thank you." she blushed and smiled. Usually without her 'costume' and make up she could easily blend in as just a waitress, but Maggie had recognized her.

"I'll be right back with your drink." she said glowing from the inside. She enjoyed singing, it was one of the things she knew she was gifted at. Singing, and not much else.

[Maggie O'Neil]

Maggie had to admit it: she was lonely. It had taken her awhile to fit in when she lived in France, but eventually she had made friends and had come out of her shell. Somehow, though, she had thought it would be easier to come back to the UK, even if she still didn’t go back to Ireland. She wanted to find her brother, and reconnect with that part of her family she had left behind through no choice of her own, but she honestly didn’t know how to do that, either. Even her temporary teaching job at Hogwarts didn’t make her feel at ease, even though she loved working with kids again. She needed a friend; someone she could talk to and give advice to. Right now, she was just drifting.

She sighed and leaned back in her seat for a moment, thinking again about her brother. The truth was, she wasn’t even sure Jack was still alive. The last time she had seen him, he was about to take on their abusive father. Maybe he hadn’t survived. Mama hadn’t even wanted to look back and find out—she just wanted to leave it all behind and forget about all the pain and sorrow. She had never mentioned it again to Maggie; not once had she ever mentioned her father, or Jack, or anything about their old life. And yet, even after all of that, she had repeated the same mistake and got involved with another abusive man, and wound up getting killed. Maggie was determined not to follow her mother’s example, which was why she never let men get close to her, even though there was a part of her that really did want to find love and happiness and have lots of babies. She just didn’t know how to let her defenses down and let a guy get close to her.

Right now, however, she would have settled for just one friend; someone who would notice if she was sad or would laugh with her if she was happy. Someone who would care if she was hurt, or who would miss her when she was gone.

She was feeling a bit overwhelmed by her thoughts, and without even realizing it, tears were streaming down her face as she sat alone in the bar.

[Vanessa VanRyan]

"Woah, woah, woah...hey there honey your mascara's running." Vanessa said setting the drink down quickly and instinctively putting her hand on the girl's shoulder, "You alright?"

Clearly not. But Vanessa recognized the look, she had given the same look herself not too long ago. She reached into her apron and pulled out a few napkins for the girl.

[Maggie O'Neil]

Maggie immediately felt foolish. She always tried not to be that girl who got emotional in public. She knew all too well how easily people could prey on women who were vulnerable, and she had always done her best not to seem weak. It was just that she felt so out of place in England, and so alone. Normally she was OK with being alone, but sometimes, like tonight, she just wished she had someone to talk to.

"Oh, Merlin, I'm so sorry. I don't know what came over me, honestly. I guess I just... I was thinking of home."

That was it, really. Her home had never exactly been a warm and fuzzy place, but that didn't mean she didn't have some good memories of it. She remembered how her mother used to bake cookies and let Maggie lick the bowl. She remembered playing in the yard with Jack. Even on occasion, her father had been kind enough to tell her bedtime stories. And while she didn't want to go back to that, since those happy memories were so few and far between, she still longed for the feeling of knowing that she didn't have to do it all on her own. That someone was looking out for her.

"I imagine working in a place like this, you get lots of sad drunks... And yet, I don't even have that excuse. I haven't even had a sip of butter beer yet."