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Post by Mathieu Ferrera on Jul 1, 2009 17:49:23 GMT -5
Ever since moving in to Roland's apartment the day after the funeral, Mathieu had been pretty much holed up in there, wallowing in his own grief. He hadn't eaten or even showered in days, and he was growing a very unkempt beard.
In short, he was a wreck. It wasn't until a copy of the Daily Prophet arrived (Roland's subscription kept coming, because no one bothered to cancel it) and informed him that someone had attacked Riley right inside the Ministry. A connection was suspected between the attack and Roland's death.... which immediately caught Mathieu's attention.
For the first time in days, he took a shower and got dressed, intending to visit Riley at the hospital. He had some questions, and maybe she could answer them.
He still looked shaggy and unkempt when he arrived at the hospital; he was still unshaven and his clothes were rumpled. It was no wonder that he got some suspicious looks when he approached the reception desk and asked to see Riley Neves.
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Post by Riley Neves on Jul 1, 2009 19:00:59 GMT -5
Mathieu was, like anyone who asked to visit Riley or Geoffrey, checked over to make sure he wasn't under any curses. He was perhaps checked over a little more extensively because of his haggard looks, but when they heard he was Roland's father, they didn't even ask Riley if she wanted to see him. They assumed she would, afterall.
Riley had barely spoken to anyone. She was finally allowed to be alone, but she was ever aware of the security around her. She was safe, but it didn't make her feel better. She looked up when the door opened, a medi-nurse stepping indisde, and behind her, someone else came in. She didn't recognize him right away, but she felt nervous when she did. The woman asked if she should stay, and Riley hesitated.
Finally, she shook her head. "No, it's allright." She waited for the nurse to leave, then smiled weakly at Mathieu. He was the last person she expected, honestly.
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Post by Mathieu Ferrera on Jul 1, 2009 20:33:32 GMT -5
Mathieu looked at her for a long moment, not saying anything. In his state of grief, he really wasn't able to relate well to others, or even notice that someone else was in equally bad shape as himself. And looking at her was harder than looking at anyone else. All he could think about when he saw her was that Roland had loved her. It should have been a bond between them, but instead it gave Mathieu a sad sense of what would never be.
He wasn't even sure how to begin or what to say, so he slowly crossed the room and sat down in the little chair next to her bed.
"Riley, I...." He sighed and began to rub his face. "They say... The attack on you might be connected to Roland's killer."
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Post by Riley Neves on Jul 1, 2009 20:44:38 GMT -5
Riley sat up straighter when he came closer, and she started to chew on the inside of her bottom lip. What was she supposed to tell him? That yes, it probably was, and she had been expecting it to happen? That she knew Blake Malfoy was responsible for his son's death? Looking at him, she knew he couldn't. He would go after Blake and the other guy, and he was really in no shape to.
"It's possible that it was," she said softly. "That's mostly Paige Owen's guess, I suppose. I'm working on that murder case of Katie Lawrence. There's an equally probably chance that my attack was related to that."
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Post by Mathieu Ferrera on Jul 1, 2009 20:56:57 GMT -5
Mathieu frowned. This was not what he wanted to hear. But this was one matter he wasn't willing to push aside. He'd crossed over into the anger stage of his grief, and all he could think about was finding his son's killer and making him pay.
"But you were there. You were with him when he...." His voice broke, unable to say the word. "You were a witness... it makes sense that they'd come after you... Did he tell you anything? Give you any kind of clue about who might have wanted to... kill him?"
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Post by Riley Neves on Jul 1, 2009 21:26:15 GMT -5
The only people that she was aware of that knew she had any idea who was involved in Roland's murder were Hayden an Geoffrey. Geoff, she was confident, would not say anything. So unless Hayden did, she was safe.
"I'm an Auror. It makes sense that a lot of people would want to kill me. And maybe it was related to Roland's death. But it was Geoffrey that fired the spell. I don't know anything."
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Post by Mathieu Ferrera on Jul 1, 2009 22:32:33 GMT -5
Mathieu was confused for a moment. "Geoffrey...?" he repeated. "He wouldn't..."
He stopped, remembering the article. It had mentioned something about the Imperius Curse possibly playing a part in it. He hadn't entirely comprehended what the article was trying to say; it had all be so very vague. But now it made sense. "So he was the one who was hit with the Imperius Curse? Does that mean.... maybe he saw the killer? Maybe he can identify him?"
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Post by Riley Neves on Jul 1, 2009 22:53:09 GMT -5
"It wasn't Roland's killer," Riley said softly. She knew this instinctively. She knew that Blake wasn't likely to do his own dirty work. He'd killed Roland on a personal vendetta. She was, at this point, something annoying to be taken care of. Afterall, he sent someone else after Lina.
"I'm on his case, Mathieu. I'll find his killer and bring him in, I swear. Don't ask Geoffrey. He doesn't know anything, and the description i've heard he gave the Ministry could describe a thousand guys."
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Post by Mathieu Ferrera on Jul 1, 2009 23:07:29 GMT -5
Mathieu's frown deepened, and for a moment, it looked like he was going to break down in tears. "I just want... whoever killed him needs to pay for it. I want the killer to suffer.... the way I'm suffering..."
In his head, he knew that wasn't going to make him feel any better. The only thing that could ever make him feel better was to have his son back, but that wasn't possible, was it? Roland was gone... and Mathieu was going to have to learn to live with that fact.
"Do you know... I always feared this would happen to him. I worried more for him than for the other children. I felt like... he didn't care enough what happened to him. Or maybe he just thought he was invincible. I don't know. He took too many risks... he seemed like he was drawn to danger..."
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Post by Riley Neves on Jul 1, 2009 23:18:37 GMT -5
Riley didn't know what to say. Talking to cara, though, she almost wondered if this was the most Mathieu had said to anyone at one time. She didn't want to discourage him from talking. He probably needed it.
"It's not that he cared less about what happened to himself, he just... He was so worried about you, his family. More than most people. He told me constantly how he would do anything to protect you. He loved you and Cara and his siblings so much."
She couldn't imagine a family bond like that. Seeing mathieu's face, she wanted to break down into tears so badly. "I'm so sorry, Mathieu, but I'm doing everything I can to catch his killer."
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Post by Mathieu Ferrera on Jul 1, 2009 23:29:53 GMT -5
Mathieu squeezed his eyes shut, and a single tear slipped from the corner of one eye. "But he never thought we might feel the same way about him," he said softly. "If I could take his place, I would. He should have had a chance to live..."
He drew a shaky sigh and looked up at her, as if seeing her for the first time. "He loved you, you know. Did you know that?"
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Post by Riley Neves on Jul 1, 2009 23:39:01 GMT -5
"You're right," Riley said softly. "He didn't understand that you all have that fierce loyalty to each other."
A fierce loyalty that she could have had the chance to experience, if she hadn,t pushed him away so much. Her breath caught in her throat when Mathieu told her that Roland loved her. Was he angry? Were they connecting on some level? She didn't know.
"He told me," she whispered.
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Post by Mathieu Ferrera on Jul 1, 2009 23:56:53 GMT -5
Mathieu looked at her, wondering if she was telling the truth. Had Roland, knowing he was about to die, told Riley how he felt about her? It would have been just like him to do something like that, and it certainly would have caused Riley to react the way she had.
"I know he was... hard to deal with sometimes. And you two fought a lot. But do you think...maybe you could have loved him, too?"
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Post by Riley Neves on Jul 2, 2009 0:05:39 GMT -5
Riley was quiet for a long time after Mathieu asked her this. It was something that everyone just assumed... Obviously, if she was mourning like this, she must have loved it. She hated that assumption. Mathieu was the first person outside of Geoffrey to ask her, and it was different. Geoffrey had already been convinced of the answer. Mathieu was honestly asking because he wanted to know. And in that instant, a lot of realizations hit her with the force of a tidal wave, and she couldn't stop the tears.
"I did," she whispered, her eyes dropping. "When we were arguing at Christmas dinner, and we went into your office to talk... We kissed. It wasn't even the first time... But I fell in love with him then."
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Post by Mathieu Ferrera on Jul 2, 2009 0:17:14 GMT -5
When she started to cry, he couldn't hold it in any longer. He broke down and sobbed. It just wasn't fair. Roland and Riley could have been together. He could have been happy. Mathieu covered his face with his hands and as he wept, he saw a whole life flash before his eyes. Roland getting married, having children, having a life with Riley. A life that would never be. As a parent, you want the best for your children, for them to have every opportunity, for them to have a life and a family. And now Roland would never have that.
How was Mathieu supposed to go on, to deal with that lost potential?
Reaching out to the first person since he'd held Amandine on the day they told the children about Roland, Mathieu extended a hand to Riley. He'd wanted to be angry with her, but he just couldn't. She had lost him, too.
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Post by Riley Neves on Jul 2, 2009 11:52:17 GMT -5
Riley took a deep breath, moving closer to Mathieu, and she put her arms around him. "I'm so sorry, Mathieu. I'm sorry it wasn't me, and I'm sorry I couldn't save him. But I'll make it up to you," she promised, knowing she would. She would find Roland's killer and end this. If only she could bring Roland back.
"I know it doesn't help, but he wasn't alone when he died. I was there, and he knew I was there for him. Whatever consolation that may be..." She ached for his loss. She also knew that he was giving her more right now than he gave anyone, including Cara, and she actually felt moved by that knowledge. All she wanted to do was help them.
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Post by Mathieu Ferrera on Jul 3, 2009 0:24:46 GMT -5
It didn't help. None of it helped. He kept hoping he would find some small measure of comfort somewhere, but there was just nothing. It didn't help to know that Riley had loved Roland, it didn't help to know that she'd been there with him when it happened, it didn't help to know that he'd probably never felt any pain, and it wouldn't help even when they caught his killer. None of it was going to make him feel any better.
He just wanted Roland back.
Mathieu cried heavily for a few minutes, then he slowly began to pull away. The walls came back up, and when he looked at Riley, the change was evident. "Thank you," he said stiffly, dabbing at his eyes.
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Post by Riley Neves on Jul 3, 2009 22:18:24 GMT -5
Riley didn't want to lose Mathieu, or any kind of connection they may have had, for however long.
"Mathieu, please, I..." how did she get him back again? She saw the shift in his eyes and his manner, and she didn't want him to go back to being so quiet.
But how did she manage that? She couldn't say she needed him. That wasn't fair of her.
"I'm sorry," she said again.
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Post by Mathieu Ferrera on Jul 3, 2009 23:13:30 GMT -5
Mathieu felt awkward, like he'd shared too much with her. It was one thing to open up to him brother, but Riley... he barely knew the girl. And yet, Roland had loved her. She could have been his daughter in law. The idea of Roland settling down and having a family wasn't as important to Mathieu as it had been for Cara, but he did want to see his son happy. And Riley could have made him happy. They'd been so close to finding happiness and it had been ripped away from them.
"He really didn't tell you anything about the people who were trying to get him? Not even a clue? Do you think he knew who they were?"
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Post by Riley Neves on Jul 4, 2009 10:08:15 GMT -5
"He knew who they were," Riley said, hating to lie to Roland's father. But she couldn't tell him about Blake Malfoy. He was hurting too much, and didn't have the clear head that he would need to go after Blake. And he would go after Blake.
"But he wouldn't tell me who. He said it put me in too much danger if I knew. I kept begging him to tell me, but he refused. I'm looking into the one that attacked Geoffrey, hoping he'll give me some clues. But I will let you know when I know anything."
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