Angry

[Remus Lupin]

Remus ran all the way up to the seventh floor. He couldn't believe how angry and hurt he felt inside. How could his father lie to him all this time? Why couldn't he remember anything about growing up with Kris? He was so angry that when he ran out of stairs to climb, he stood in the hallway, kicking at an old suit of armor.

[Kris Lupin]

Kris had chased Remus all the way to the seventh floor. She skidded to a stop at the corner of the hallway he was in. She bent over her hands on her knees and said as she tried to catch her breath, "Boy...you sure..can run...fast!"

[Remus Lupin]

"Yeah, whatever," Remus grumbled, kicking the suit of armor again. This time he could have sworn he heard it say "ouch!" Still, he kicked again. "You shouldn't have followed me. I really don't want to talk. I just... I need to think."

[Kris Lupin]

"You're just mad at him for lying to you. But think about how I felt, I never got to see our parents. While you got to see them everyday, I didn't even get a birthday or Christmas gift...you had them...I had someone who I didn't want to be with." Kris said looking at him, he had got to be with them, she didn't.

[Remus Lupin]

"Yeah, but at least you knew where you belonged," Remus pointed out. "You knew what you were missing. I didn't know. I didn't know about you. How could I not remember? Why can't I remember now? I feel like my life is a lie... like I'm not who I thought I was. Do you know what that feels like?"

[Kris Lupin]

"Yes, when Greyback was telling me lies, I started feeling that way and then when I came back here after he bit me I didn't think I belonged here. If I hadn't had that picture I showed you I would probably have forgot." Kris said looking at the floor. "I would have wrote but mom's friend didn't have an owl."

[Remus Lupin]

Remus sighed. "Yeah, but the lies he told you... they weren't coming from someone you love. They came from someone you hate. I trusted our father, Kris, and he lied to me. And my memories... they're not mine. They're not real. I don't remember you. I feel like there's this hole in my life, from back when I was normal... and I don't know how to get it back."

[Kris Lupin]

Kris looked at him and slowly waked to him. "Do you ever have dreams that seem more like memories? But you push the thought away because you can't imagine it could be one?" She stopped a few feet away from him.

[Remus Lupin]

He stopped and stared at her. "I had a couple of them... from when I was really little. Someone else was in them, too... but I never saw a face. Just a voice. And a feeling. Oh, and after I killed the neighbor's cow while in wolf form, I had nightmares about eating it for weeks. And I always have dreams of the night I was bitten."

[Kris Lupin]

"What were these dreams about? What happened in them? I could tell you if it really happened or not." Kris said. "I really want to help you, you're my brother, and I want to be there for you..since I couldn't be there before." Kris looked around then asked, "How about we sit here and talk?" She pointed at the floor by the wall.

[Remus Lupin]

Remus sank down onto the hard stone floor. "Yeah, OK. We can talk, I guess." He sighed. "In one of them... I... I was running around the house, because I didn't want to go to bed. And I hid in the closet, but the closet door latched behind me from the outside and I couldn't get out. I felt like I was suffocating, like the closet was closing in around me. I started banging on the doors and then suddenly, the doors opened and I saw someone... someone I knew... and I was happy, I threw my arms around the person, but I never saw the person's face."

[Kris Lupin]

Kris smiled and she sat beside him. "I remember that, mom didn't know where you were, I was up late finishing my chores and when I was going to my room I heard you banging. You ended up having to sleep in my bed with me that night." She looked at him still smiling. She was happy he was willing to talk to her.

[Remus Lupin]

Remus gasped. "So then... it was you?"

[Kris Lupin]

"Yeah, it was me. I think your attack traumatized you where you forgot me but the memories are there just locked up. And your subconscious is trying to help you remember." Kris said. "What about your other dreams? What were they about?"

[Remus Lupin]

"The others aren't as specific," he said. "I really just remember one other thing... when I had a nightmare and I wsa screaming and someone hugged me and help me calm down. That's pretty much it."

[Kris Lupin]

"That was also me, those were the nights you would sleep with me. Or sometimes you would have me stay in your room and tell you a story. Half the time I had to think fast." She said. "In a way you do remember me, just not everything."

[Remus Lupin]

Remus frowned. "Not much at all," he said. "I... I don't remember the stories. My mom used to read to me sometimes, but I don't remember you telling me stories." He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "It's so confusing. Why can't I remember?"

[Kris Lupin]

"I don't know, I wish I could tell you, maybe if you give dad a chance he could tell you. So how about it?" She hated seeing him so upset, she had hated seeing him so hurt and sad about Sabrina's death.

[Remus Lupin]

Remus sighed. "I don't want to see him right now. I don't know how to trust him anymore."

[Kris Lupin]

"I don't really trust him either, he let me believe that I was leaving for my protection, he didn't tell me any different. But I still love him...besides...you don't have to talk to him or look at him...you have me to talk to..." She said quietly tugging on her hair.