Under a willow tree (open)

[Alice Prewett]

Alice leaned back against a willow tree that was located right along the edge of the lake her eyes were closed and a book was laying open in her lap. To any passersby she would look as if she'd fallen asleep studying. However she was awake and just taking a moment away from studying her advanced charms. She adored charms spells but after an hour of studying advanced potions her mind felt a bit numb. Several other books were scattered about her, one from the library on charms and two others she'd already looked at that day in potions.

She was dreading her NEWTs and knew she'd have to study hard to get accepted into auror training. She had to get at least an E or O in five of her subjects and she was determined to make sure she accomplished them all. Alice took in a deep breath, smelling the mist filled air just enjoying being outside. It was her favorite place to study when she wasn't inside the castle and it helped relax her.

Alice kept her eyes closed as she practiced some of her non-vocal charms in her head, though her wand remained next to her untouched on the ground. Her mind began to drift again. Frank. His handsome clear eyes that twinkled when he laughed... and that smile... She felt warm thinking about those eyes. She wasn't some doe eyed school girl who normally dated much. Of course she'd had a few short weeks of dating someone here and there but nothing of major signifigance. She found she kept comparing them to her friend Frank. She blushed then, her eyes still tightly shut. She would never admit to it of course but at least in her own dreams she could pretend they were more than friends.

It would be easier of course if he hadn't been avoiding her lately.. not that she could blame him with what had happend but .. did he really think she would just become some chit who mooned after him just because of one kiss? She groaned remembering for a moment until she shook the thought. She should never have let that happen. And now look where it got her.. she couldn't face him that was for sure. And if he wanted to avoid her that was fine, she didn't really want to be tempted by his eyes anyways. She mentally pushed the thoughts away when she realized what she was doing. Blast the guy for a newt! She was not going to let Frank distract her like this, not when she was sure it was all her imagination anyways.

Alice sighed and went back to rehersing silent charms once again and only opened her eyes to read the next spell before closing them to recite again. Concentrate. She must concentrate.

[Andromeda Tonks]

Andi had a bit of time between classes, so she decided to take a littlw walk around the grounds. It felt strange being back here again. It had only been two years since she had left, and she hadn't really expected to end up back here. Not that she was complaining. She'd always loved the grounds of Hogwarts, both inside and out. And she loved the excited energy of children, learning, playing, trying to figure out who they were and who they wanted to become. Some were popular, some were smart, some were outcasts, and oddballs. She had somehow always identified with all of them. In school, she'd had no shortage of friends. She'd always been surrounded by them. Yet in so many ways, she was an outcast, too. At least in her own family. And there had always been just a precious few who actually understood her and liked her for who she really was.

As she neared the lake, her thoughts drifted to Ted. Thoughts of him never failed to make her smile. The thought occurred to her that she was probably grinning like a lovesick fool, but she couldn't help it. In a short time, he had come to be the best thing in her life. When she was with him, she was home.

As she neared the old willow tree, she recognized a girl sitting against the tree. Her eyes were closed, as if in deep concentration. Smiling to herself, she approached slowly, not wanting to frighten her cousin. "Alice? Is that you?"

[Alice Prewett]

Alice hadn't heard anyone approaching but did manage to hear a familiar voice through her concentration. She opened one eye slowly and gave the woman walking towards her a lopsided grin before opening the other eye as she turned to look at her cousin. "Hey Andi.. yes, it's me.. here like usual studying. What are you doing out here? I thought they kept you locked away in the greenhouses now when Ted isn't stealing you away that is."

Alice chuckled softly at her own joke and grinned teasingly at one of her favorite cousins. Between Molly, Andi and Sirius and the twins of course... Andi was one of her closest friends and family members. She had struggled with many of the same issues that she herself dealt with in the Black family. Her mother was a Black and had not been removed from the family tree due to her "proper" marriage to a good wizarding family the Prewett's. However that was not the case for all the Prewett family members. And Alice had not been acknowledged into the family tree when she was sorted into Gryffindor so many years ago and was known to be a supporter of non-traditionalist sentiments. She happened to be good friends with muggle borns and was proud of it too. So for the same reason she too had been ignored by most of the Black family. Except for Andi and Sirius of course, whom she respected.

Alice closed her book at patted the ground beside her indicating for Andi to join her in the serene little spot that the willow branches made before dropping off into the lake.

[Andromeda Tonks]

"I had a little spare time between classes," she replied with a grin.

At the mention of Ted, Andi felt her cheeks grow warm. Having just started her position as Herbology professor, she hadn't had a chance to talk to Alice in a while, other than in her first class the other day. Just as she had with Molly, she felt incredibly guilty for not talking to her cousin sooner. Sitting down next to Alice, she pulled her hair back from her face into a loose ponytail and used her wand to conjure a ribbon to tie it.

"So, you've heard about my 'scandalous' affair with Ted, have you? I imagine the word should be everywhere by now. I'm sorry I didn't talk to you about it sooner."

[Alice Prewett]

Alice's eyes softened towards her older cousin. "Oh yes, I've heard how could I not have? It's all over the school already. And you know as well as I how us 'blood traitors" are treated." She winked, "Not that I mind though.. the family who is worth calling family all still love you. The others are too lost in blood status to know that what love really is anyways."

The thought of Frank popped into her head again unbidden and she shook it off for now, this wasn't the time to moon over a man who avoided you.. no matter how she felt about him. Alice took in a breath of fresh air to clear her mind of sexy eyes and back into the present with Andi.

"You know I don't get upset if you're busy. After all, you have a class to teach now along with being an auror, and a man to make happy. That's enough reason for me to be understanding if you get distracted once in a while." She paused a moment before changing the subject to the fact of aurors... she was hoping her cousin might help her get an interview at the end of school for training to become one herself.

[Andromeda Tonks]

Andi sighed. It was at times like this that she really hated the wizarding world. Or maybe it was just the world in general. Why was everyone so prejudiced? Why couldn't two people just love each other in peace? She would never understand how there could be anything wrong with loving who she wanted. Wasn't love supposed to be a good thing?

"I had no idea it spread so quickly," she said. "I mean, really, don't people have better things to talk about than my love life? I'm not ashamed, but you know, it's my business, isn't it? I love him... why does everyone have to be so threatened by it?"

She knew the answers to her questions, but she didn't understand them. It just didn't seem fair to her. Ted was a talented and powerful wizard in his own right; it made no difference to her who his parents were.

"I imagine Dad will be finding out soon enough," she said grimly. "But he pretty much threw me out anyway, after I decided to become an auror. It's not like he can disown me twice. And to be honest, I really have had it with just about the whole family." She pondered telling Alice of Narcissa's change of heart, but she decided to keep it silent for now. She wasn't sure if Cissa wanted everyone to know, for fear it would get back to Bella.

[Alice Prewett]

Alice nodded in agreement. She understood how Andi felt. Although she wasn't in love with a muggle born, she was in love even if she wasn't ready to admit it to anyone yet. She'd realized it the night she heard Frank talking to some younger girl and had been jealous for the first time in her life. Surely that meant she'd somehow fallen in love with him. Not that it changed anything since he wasn't talking to her now. She sighed to herself and listened to Andi talk about her dad, Alice's uncle.

"Yeah stuff like that spreads quick with students who have nothing else of interest besides studying, especially when it involves one of the professors. And even more so when it involves one of the more influential wizarding families." Alice's mother had been a Black before marrying her father, and she knew as well as any one how the inner workings of the Black family dealt with things. Utter rejection if you didn't uphold their traditions completely. Alice intended to follow in the footsteps of her cousin, Andi, as well and become an Auror.

"But at least you and Cissa can still talk, even if Bella has come to hate you as much as she does me and Molly. But who knows maybe there's still hope if Cissa can change their minds to make them understand." She doubted it but she didn't want Andi to give up hope and she knew how important family could be. Even if family meant Bellatrix, she was still Andi's sister and Alice was sure that Andi was heartbroken over them not giving her the understanding of what love truly meant.

She grinned, "Besides, Ted is much cuter than the Black family men." She winked trying to lighten the mood.

[Andromeda Tonks]

Andi smiled slightly. "Yeah, Cissa was a bit more supportive than Bella, she just doesn't know how to stand up to her. She's not quite as strong as I was, you know? So I can talk to Cissa, but only in private. Still, it's better than being cut off from the whole family. I always knew it was going to happen, I just wasn't prepared for how much it was going to hurt."

It was true. She and Bella had been at odds almost since Bella was born. They were polar opposites, like two sides of the same coin. They were made of the same Black family traits--stubbornness, determination, strength, and a terrible temper. But Andi looked at the world differently from Bella. She had always rejected the claims of blood purity and the so-called superiority it supposedly gave them. She liked muggles and had associated with at least one other muggleborn before Ted. But Bella... when she spoke, she sounded exactly like their father. Andi took the light path, while Bella had taken dark. That had made for some legendary family battles and a great deal of rivalry and resentment. But through it all, she still loved her sister. She was her blood, and there was still a part of her that ached to reconcile with her, and to somehow pull her out of the darkness. They'd always made up before, although the peace had never lasted long. But Andi had a feeling that this time, the split was permanent.

At the mention of how cute Ted was, Andi blushed. "He is, isn't he?" she said with an uncharacteristic giggle. "If you think he looks good in pictures, you should meet him in person. His eyes are so blue... and his smile...." She gave a dreamy sigh. "But enough about me! What's going on with you? Tell me everything!"

[Alice Prewett]

Alice giggled too, Andi had an infectious laugh the type that you couldn't help but laugh with her. She was looking forward to meeting this Ted that Andi kept talking about and rumors had been based around. She'd only seen a picture of him but she knew that if Andi liked him he must be good hearted and that made him okay in her book. Alice's eyes twinkled at Andi's dreamy sigh and description of Ted's attributes.

"But enough about me! What's going on with you? Tell me everything!" said Andromeda with excitement about seeing her cousin again.

"Not much... just preparing for these dreadful NEWTs" she said pointing to the books scattered about her with a sigh. "I really want to get good scores so I can be accepted for Auror training after I finish school this year." She hesitated before mentioning Frank, she hadn't shared her feelings about him with anyone and wasn't sure if now was a good time considering how he was behaving towards her lately. But she looked at Andi and knew that if anyone would understand it was her.

"And there's this... this guy... I like him but I don't think he feels the same way. We used to be really good friends and all but.. well we kissed once on accident and he hasn't talked to me since then.. he's been avoiding me for the last few weeks. Andi, what does it feel like to be in love with a man? I don't know how I feel but lately when I see him I have knots in my stomach and stumble over my own words. Do you remember my friend Frank Longbottom?" She felt embarrassed about sharing this but she really wanted to know and get Andi's opinion.

[Andromeda Tonks]

"Ah, yes... NEWTs... I still sometimes have nightmares about having to take the NEWTs and not being prepared," Andi said with a little laugh. "I don't envy you... they're not easy! But I know you'll do great." She was thrilled to hear that Alice wanted to be an Auror. Since her family situation was such a mess, it was a relief to hear her cousin was choosing to follow in her footsteps. "And you know what? You'll be a great Auror. I'll be sure to put in a good word for you once you graduate."

At the mention of a guy, however, Andi's ears perked up even more. As with any person in love, Andi wanted everyone else she cared about to know what it was like to be in love. So to hear that Alice was also having feelings for someone filled Andi with joy. But as always happened in the beginning of a relationship, there were complications and uncertainties. She and Ted had only just got past that awkward stage of their relationship, so she knew how it was.

"I'm so happy you've found somebody!" Andi said enthusiastically, taking her cousin's hand in hers. "If you want my opinion, here it is... nobody kisses someone by accident. It's not like he can trip and fall on your lips. If he kissed you, it was because he wanted to. And that's a very good start right there. The problem now is that you have to figure out why he's ignoring you. Was it because it wasn't good, or it wasn't what he expected? Or was it so good that it freaked him out? And the only way to really find out the answer is to ask him. Yes, he may be ignoring you, but you're the one who's letting him! Don't let him. Make him talk about it. Otherwise you're just going to keep drifting farther apart, and you'll never know what could have been."

Frank Longbottom... Andi thought about this for a minute, trying to remember the face. "You mean the kid who was always hanging around you back at school? Is that him? You two were practically inseparable!"

[Alice Prewett]

Alice nodded at Andi with a blush, "yeah that's him... we USED to be inseparable" she emphasized to her cousin with longing in her voice. She really really missed having him around. She knew Andi was right but saying to go after him was one thing... doing it was quite another. How did you chase a guy that avoided you at every step? "He dashes out of class whenever it's over and... well I've seen him with another girl yesterday.. and I... well... I think they may be dating. And the worst part is... I am jealous!!" She admitted holding her cousin's hands tighter.

"I've never been jealous about ANYONE and now he's avoiding me. I don't know if I can face him, I mean.. what if he just did it to try it out and changed his mind?!" Her teenage angst showed in her worries and she knew she was acting like a fool but she was sick to her stomach with the thought that he was avoiding her for any reason.

"And besides why would he be scared of a kiss? If he liked it wouldn't he have been happy and not afraid of me? I don't understand." she sounded frustrated and hurt and wanted someone to lean on for support, someone to tell her she was being a child about the whole thing but she couldn't help it. Why was she acting like this? She'd never behaved like a love sick puppy before and she didn't like feeling so lost.

[Andromeda Tonks]

Andi smiled at Alice's frustration. She understood all too well how frustrating and nerve wracking it could be when you were in love but you weren't sure how the other person felt. At the mention of another girl, however, Andi bristled. There was nothing that could possibly upset her more than to hear that the object of Alice's affection was possibly seeing another girl. It brought her right back to her own seventh year, thinking like a fool that she was in love with Rabastan Lestrange. So stupid to be blinded by a pretty face! And falling for the bad boy... could there be anything more cliche? The good girl, falling for the bad boy.... only to find him kissing another girl... the pain and humiliation of it still felt fresh, like a gaping wound that had never really healed.

"Another girl?" she said, her face flushing pink with righteous indignation. "How dare that little bastard... kissing you, then going out with another girl... Alice, you have to get to the bottom of this! You can't let him get away with it. What if he was seeing this other girl before he kissed you... he made you into the other woman... You can't let him do that!"

[Alice Prewett]

Andi was right of course, she couldn't let him get away a kiss and run... let alone the possibilty that she might have even been second or even if she had been first and he'd changed his mind for someone else that came along. "Oh Andi, what do I do? I've never chased after a guy before and what if he chooses her over me? I can't just walk up to him and ask him why he's been avoiding me." Alice realized that she sounded like a coward, it was not like her but the idea of hearing Frank say he didn't want her around or that he might even be using her as some kissing test dummy for a date with someone else would be devastating.

Alice sounded utterly torn, she wanted to chase after him and demand him to tell her what was going on with him lately.. but on the other hand she was scared to her toes of what he might answer. "What if he thought he'd made a mistake by kissing me and then decided to find someone else to go snog since I wasn't good enough for him? Maybe I'm only good enough to be a friend but not to love?" Just then a few tears managed to escape her eyelashes and she didn't even notice as they slid down her cheek.

[Andromeda Tonks]

Andi's arms immediately went around Alice. "Don't cry," she said gently. "It's possible that what you saw wasn't what you think. And you can't know that until you talk to him. After what happened with... him..." she refused to speak Rabastan's name, but knew that Alice would know who she was talking about-- "I take cheating a bit too personally, I know. And I haven't seen Frank for two years, so I don't really know him well... all I remember is that back when I was still in school, he seemed perfectly devoted to you. I realkly can't imagine him ditching you for another girl."

Patting Alice soothingly on the back, she added, "I'll tell you a little secret about guys... they're funny about somethings, you know? When it comes to talking about their feelings... they get scared sometimes. Even Ted... when I first told him that I loved him, it took him a while to get up the courage to say it back. And when he did, his voice kind of wavered a little bit, like it was hard to say. And you know what? It actually is kind of scary to say, because it really means so much. And if the other person doesn't say it back right away, it's like you're standing on a ledge alone... with no one to pull you back from the edge. Maybe Frank is just afraid that you don't feel the same way he does. He doesn't know how you felt about the kiss. So I think you should try to talk to him... not necessarily push him, but you should ask him about the other girl, and then find out why he's been avoiding you. It may be hard for him, because boys don't like talking about their feelings, but the two of you are holding back, and you really need to be honest with each other."

[Alice Prewett]

Alice realized how much she'd really missed having Andi around again, she'd always been there when she needed a friend and someone to give her a nudge in the right direction. Once again Andi was right, maybe she'd jumped to conclusions but she couldn't be sure until she talked to him somehow, if she could ever get him alone that was. She wiped away the tears finally and though about what Andi had said.

"Why must guys be so difficult?" she said without expecting an answer.. she gave a lopsided almost smile at her cousin. Andi was definitely right about one thing, the next time Alice saw Frank outside of class she was going to have to just walk right up and ask him about things. She felt a sense of purpose again and she would listen to her cousins advice. Andi had not steered her wrong before now, why shouldn't she be right this time? If nothing else at least getting the air clean with Frank she might be able to salvage a friendship even if he had chosen to date someone else. And even if he didn't like her kiss, at least friendship didn't require kissing. Alice took a deep breath to try to calm back down. It was so not like her to act this way, she was normally so level headed.

"You're right I need to talk to him and find out from him, I know he wouldn't lie to me if I ask him directly. Besides I guess he can't be considered cheating if he's not really mine to begin with. It's not like he's ever asked me on a date or done anything besides be my friend until the night he kissed me." She gave Andi a hug then and tried to change the subject so she didn't get herself worked up again with worry.

"After the whole thing with Rabastain, how did you ever get over it and fall in love with Ted?" She hoped to meet him one day soon, she knew she'd get along with him if Andi loved him and Alice wanted to hear some good news for once and hoped Andi would tell her more about Ted and what love was like."

[Andromeda Tonks]

"I'm glad I was able to help," Andi said, hugging her back. "I know guys are confusing... and you know what? They think the same things about us. The good ones do, anyway. Just talk to him, and one way or another, you'll feel better. Even if it turns out he doesn't feel the same way about you, at least you'll know the truth and you can move on. It'll still hurt... but at least you'll know."

At Alice's question, Andi sighed and didn't answer right away. Getting over Rabastan himself hadn't been too hard. She had always known who and what he was, even when she was in love with him. She hadn't been blinded by love; rather, she had stupidly thought that she could change him. Every smart woman thinks that at some point, she now knew. And most of them were wrong. Men couldn't be changed unless they wanted to change. And even then, the change had to come from themselves, and not from the influence of a woman. When she'd plunged headfirst into love with Rabastan, she had known that it wouldn't last. She'd hoped it would, but she knew it would not. Rabastan was not a one-woman man. He never would be. And his interest in women was not for love, but for purely physical reasons.

Getting over him had been easy enough. Moving on from him had been harder. Her relationship with Rabastan had left her with a lack of trust and self-confidence that had taken her a while to shake. In her darkest moments, she'd allowed doubts to creep into her mind, doubts that had been fed to her all her life by her cruel mother, who had constantly told her that she wasn't pretty enough, wasn't smart enough, wasn't sophisticated or well-mannered or graceful, like her sisters... Were they the reasons she couldn't hold on to Rabastan?

To counteract these self-injurious arguments, she constantly told herself that it wasn't her fault, it was his... he was untrustworthy, he was a liar and a cheater... and for a while, she thought it true of all men. She didn't date, didn't even look at other men... until Ted walked into her life with his blue eyes and little boy smile... and something in her had melted. It had been like looking right into her future and seeing perfect happiness.

"It takes time, Alice," she said at last. "Rabastan hurt me pretty badly... he broke my heart. But I always knew he would. I was stupid enough to let him. The important thing to remember is that if a relationship doesn't work out, it's not because there's something wrong with you. It's because it wasn't meant to be."

[Alice Prewett]

Alice saw the look in her cousin's eyes and decided it would be a good idea to change the subject. "You're right, I just feel so comfortable with Frank and he makes me smile and laugh. He wants to be an auror too you know. I'm just wondering if it's all it's cracked up to be you know? I mean I want to help fight dark wizards but what is it really like? to be an Auror I mean."

Alice had only recently joined the Order of the Pheonix to help fight against the new threats she'd heard about a dark wizard who was starting to gain followers. There were others of course which she had begun to wonder about being dark wizards as well but she wasn't going to go out naming names until she was sure. Especially since some where.. family. She was disgusted at the thought and hoped she was wrong about her suspicions. But that was also one of the reasons she'd been working so hard to be accepted as an Auror after she graduated. Alice was just worried that she might not be good enough but her resolve was strong enough to know that it would be worth any price if it meant protecting others from dark wizards.

[Andromeda Tonks]

"I think you'll do a great job," Andi assured her. "You're smart, you're good with magic... just stay confident and believe in yourself. The training is pretty hard, but I think you can do it. I got through it, and finally got my first assignment... but I'm worried about my cover. I mean, everyone knows that I first split with my father when I decided to become an auror... now they're supposed to believe I didn't make it as an auror and became a teacher instead. Do you think anyone is fooled? I mean, I'm still dating a fellow auror and if that's getting around, then what else do they know? If I blow my cover there's no point in still being here."

[Alice Prewett]

"Hrm.. I guess it depends on who you're supposed to be fooling. I mean.. the family knows of course but I'm not sure who else might or might not. Though I see your point. But I think just your association to Mr. Tonks is reason enough to think that even if you aren't an auror that you're close to one at the very least. So I guess it depends who you're supposed to be fooling or what your assignment is. If you're just supposed to watch and report than I don't see much harm but if you're supposed to be undercover as a potential for the other side than i doubt you'd get far... except maybe as a spy or something if they think you've gone bad after getting rejected. But... I don't know, Andi.. either way it might be shaky if things keep on their current course with Ted. And that might not have been so obvious if it hadn't been for the whispers of that whole public display the other day in the restaurant. I wasn't there but Molly told me generally what happened when I asked her about it."

Alice rambled on thinking out loud. She had wanted to ask Andi if she'd joined the order of the phoenix, but at the same time wasn't sure if it was wise to speak of it when she didn't know how Andi would take it. She trusted her cousin more than most, but still... you could never be too careful and even though Alice wasn't an auror yet.. she was a member of the order and had to protect it as well as Andi needed to protect her own involvement as an Auror. But Alice figured that if Andi could share this much with her that she should be able to trust Andi as well.

"Andi... have .. um.. have you heard of the order?" She didn't say more... if she knew about it, she'd know what order Alice meant and if not.. well then she had not given away too much either.

[Andromeda Tonks]

Andi glanced around, just to make sure no errant students were wandering around. "I'm just here as protection," she explained, lowering her voice. The Ministry thinks that not all of the current staff can be trusted, and that the Rothschilds, in particular, are in danger. Did you know that last year, someone kidnapped their son just days after he was born--right out of the school itself? They betrayed... him... and he's been targeting them ever since." She didn't want to add that the addition of Bellatrix as Isabella Rothschild's assistant was probably a terrible mistake. She had no proof that her sister was a Death Eater, but she suspected it, deep in her gut.

As Alice mentioned the Order, she nodded quietly. "Yes, I've heard of it. I joined... though I haven't met with anyone yet. Are you going to join?"