Post by Natalie St. Clare on May 18, 2007 23:01:11 GMT -5
My life is nothing but nightmares. I have them when I sleep, I have them while I'm awake. I see my own nightmares, and other people's nightmares. I see their hearts, their minds, their deepest secrets, and their fates.
I am told that I am an Empath. I don't know what that means, but I know that I can feel what other people feel. Sometimes it's so strong that I can feel it from across the room, other times I have to touch them. But it seems there is no escape from it. I can feel their fears, their happiness, their silent misery, and all with such force that I no longer know what I feel, or who I am.
Why was I cursed with this? Why me?
I remember the first time it happened. I was three. Sabrina broke something and she blamed it on the cat, but I knew she was lying. I knew it as clearly as if I'd seen her break the lamp with my own eyes. I never said anything... I could barely talk.
The next time it happened, I was in a store with mummy and a lady came up to pat my head and say how cute I was. I could feel many emotions from her--she had lost a little baby to dragon pox and she never got over it.
The emotions and thoughts and secrets are bad enough. What I hate even more is when I see a glimpse of the paths that they are on. Often, I see their deaths. It seems that I only really see them if they are coming soon. It was only in the few months before my mum's death that I began to see the visions of her death. The same with Sabrina. I didn't see her death until Mummy died. But it changed several times. It's as if a person's path can change course... and yet, although the circumstances around Sabrina's death changed several times, I still couldn't prevent it from happening.
But I also saw Daddy's death in my vision, and he's still alive. I can only guess that I saw what appeared to be his death, but was really him setting it up to look like it was. It's so confusing. But the good news is, I haven't seen any more visions of his death.
I miss Sabrina. More than I even know how to describe. I should have been able to save her. I wish I'd never been given this so called gift if I can't use it to prevent people from dying...
I am told that I am an Empath. I don't know what that means, but I know that I can feel what other people feel. Sometimes it's so strong that I can feel it from across the room, other times I have to touch them. But it seems there is no escape from it. I can feel their fears, their happiness, their silent misery, and all with such force that I no longer know what I feel, or who I am.
Why was I cursed with this? Why me?
I remember the first time it happened. I was three. Sabrina broke something and she blamed it on the cat, but I knew she was lying. I knew it as clearly as if I'd seen her break the lamp with my own eyes. I never said anything... I could barely talk.
The next time it happened, I was in a store with mummy and a lady came up to pat my head and say how cute I was. I could feel many emotions from her--she had lost a little baby to dragon pox and she never got over it.
The emotions and thoughts and secrets are bad enough. What I hate even more is when I see a glimpse of the paths that they are on. Often, I see their deaths. It seems that I only really see them if they are coming soon. It was only in the few months before my mum's death that I began to see the visions of her death. The same with Sabrina. I didn't see her death until Mummy died. But it changed several times. It's as if a person's path can change course... and yet, although the circumstances around Sabrina's death changed several times, I still couldn't prevent it from happening.
But I also saw Daddy's death in my vision, and he's still alive. I can only guess that I saw what appeared to be his death, but was really him setting it up to look like it was. It's so confusing. But the good news is, I haven't seen any more visions of his death.
I miss Sabrina. More than I even know how to describe. I should have been able to save her. I wish I'd never been given this so called gift if I can't use it to prevent people from dying...
