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Post by Lyra Newbury on Jan 19, 2017 4:18:51 GMT -5
Finally! Lyra was no longer on house arrest, though she continued to stay at Samantha's house. Her friend was right, there were simply too many memories of Julian at her home. It didn't matter that the Montgomery estates had more people to potential give her unwanted sympathetic looks or that the creature comforts Julian had gifted to her were constant reminders of Julian sitting inside the enormous castle. Julian haunted Lyra's flat and until she was ready to either deal with the emotions properly (ha!) or figure out some was to exercise his memory from her home, she would be staying with her friend.
Lyra informed Sam and Nik that she was picking up some things from her place and despite Nik insisting he go along or simply have someone else pick them up for her she refused. She threw a Lyra sized tantrum to boot, claiming she could never heal properly if they didn't let her try to move on. It worked, though there was clear apprehension on both their faces.
But Nik was right and she simply couldn't bring herself to open her front door. She stood there for several minutes before giving up and turning to leave. Sad and still hurt from Julian's betrayal and the loss of her love, Lyra needed an escape. She wasn't to the point of hurting that cutting was the answer but she didn't want to get there either. She needed something else which is how she found herself at Stu's for the first time in several weeks.
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Post by Vanessa VanRyan on Jan 19, 2017 13:50:33 GMT -5
"Look what the cat dragged in. I thought we might have scared you away." Vanessa said gently approaching the girl. There was a tightness in Vanessa, not her usual open self, but she was still friendly if nothing else.
"Can I get you something to eat or drink?"
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Post by Lyra Newbury on Jan 19, 2017 15:29:51 GMT -5
Lyra was made up, wearing a skirt and heels, and her hair was curled. On first glance she would have looked much like her regular self. But after a longer look it would be easy to notice the changes. Her eyes didn't have that youthful sparkle they once held. She was thinner than she had been, which caused Nicolas great stress. And her walk was more somber. Even as she pulled out her chair and sat at the small round table, Lyra's shoulder weren't as taut as they once were.
She gave a small smile at Vanessa but it didn't meet her eyes. "Hey V. I'll have a glass of wine," she stated simply, then realized that wasn't enough information. She wanted something that reminded her of Julian though she knew she shouldn't want such things. She was weak. "Something red. I don't care what."
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Post by Vanessa VanRyan on Jan 19, 2017 15:40:43 GMT -5
"You got it hun. I'll be right back."
Vanessa left to complete the order. She was off in a few minutes and honestly didn't think she could keep going with the smile she had in place. She would have tried a charm if she knew how to do them, but she wasn't very skilled with magic having never received a proper education.
A few minutes later she returned. "Here ya go." she smiled, "Are you singing tonight?"
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Post by Lyra Newbury on Jan 19, 2017 16:05:59 GMT -5
Lyra, on the other hand, was very skilled in vanity charms. She was a little rusty as of late, having relied so heavily on the enchanted jewelry Nicolas had given her. But she wasn't wearing it as often since she and Julian decided to not-date and be not-boyfriend and not-girlfriend. She wanted to be honest and open with him and that meant showing her pain around him. He told her relationships were messy and she had been okay with that. Clearly he wasn't. Stop thinking about him.
Fat chance.
Vanessa returned with her glass of wine and Lyra gave another unconvincing smile as thanks. "I don't know yet," she answered Vanessa's question about karaoke. "Maybe. Are you?"
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Post by Vanessa VanRyan on Jan 19, 2017 16:11:30 GMT -5
She gave her a deadpanned expression, "I don't really have a choice."
It wasn't so bad, Vanessa loved singing, and sometimes it was the only way to relieve the ache in her heart. But other times she wanted to keep her pain private.
Even now there were a couple of regulars looking in her direction wondering when she would get up to sing. They made their desire known the longer they stared.
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Post by Lyra Newbury on Jan 19, 2017 16:21:29 GMT -5
Lyra tilted her head to the side in sympathy then remembered it was a loathsome expression and she quickly stopped. A quick glance around the room proved that indeed there were people staring expectantly in Vanessa's direction waiting for her to take the stage.
"At least it means they like you." Lyra tried to hold back the sudden pout that forcing its way onto her face as her eyes grew watery. "They don't want to leave the country to get away from you." Her lip quivered and her hands began to shake at the thought of Julian running so far away from her.
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Post by Vanessa VanRyan on Jan 19, 2017 16:31:51 GMT -5
Vanessa could easily see that she had stumbled in their conversation as Lyra began to exhibit signs of an impending melt down.
"Honey are you alright?" she asked with concern.
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Post by Lyra Newbury on Jan 19, 2017 17:27:47 GMT -5
Lyra nodded, still attempting to stifle the tears and signs that she was hurting, then shook her head and shut her eyes. A few tears pushed themselves out the corners of her eyes but she held the rest back as she took a deep breath in an attempt to regain composure. She looked at Vanessa then, embarrassed, looked away and lifted her wine glass to her lips. It was not a dainty sip.
"I'm sorry," she said on an exhale as she looked to the ceiling to stem the tears. "I've not been having an easy time," she admitted. Lyra gave a dark, breathy laugh. Not an easy time. That was certainly a mild way to put it.
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Post by Vanessa VanRyan on Jan 19, 2017 17:53:17 GMT -5
"I get off in about ten minutes. Then you can tell me all about it okay?" she asked warmly then disappeared without giving Lyra the chance to deny her company. The truth was Vanessa needed to get her mind off of her own problems, and listening to Lyra's would help.
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Post by Lyra Newbury on Jan 19, 2017 19:04:54 GMT -5
Lyra didn't want to talk about Julian. It hurt too much to think about him. She cried, Merlin how she cried. She didn't want to cry in front of all of these people. She just wanted to be left alone with any sort of alcohol that would erase the pain.
And more than anything she wanted to talk about Julian. She had so much to say and needed so desperately to cry about it all. She needed someone to realize that the scars on her thigh had nothing to do with Julian and everything to do with her insecurities and inability to cope. She needed to tell everyone how wonderful Julian was to her. How much he cared for her. And how hollow she feels now that he is gone. She didn't have anyone she could say these things to.
Samantha always had a sympathetic yet hard look when Lyra tried to talk about her ex-not-boyfriend. It made things so much worse knowing that Lyra caused the rift between Julian and Sam, and Julian and Nik now too. Merlin, she'd torn everyone away from Julian!
She finished her wine quickly and prayed Vanessa would refill it without asking any questions. She also happened to be praying that Vanessa came and asked her all the questions that Samantha and Nicolas seemed to be avoiding.
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Post by Vanessa VanRyan on Jan 19, 2017 19:57:41 GMT -5
Something told me it was over
When I saw you and her talking,
Something deep down in my soul said, "cry girl"ยด,
When I saw you and that girl, walking out.
Ooo I would rather, I would rather go blind boy,
Than to see you, walk away from me child, and all
Ooooo so you see, I love you so much
That I don't want to watch you leave me baby,
Most of all, I just don't, I just don't want to be free no
Ooo I was just, I was just, I was just sitting here thinking
Of your kiss and your warm embrace, yeah,
When the reflection in the glass that I held to my lips, now baby,
Revealed the tears that was on my face, yeah.
Ooo and baby, baby, I would rather, I would rather be blind boy
Than to see you walk away, see you walk away from me, yeah
Ooo baby, baby, baby, I'd rather be blind now...
Her last song of the night left a stillness in the bar. There was a depressive cloud that hung over the room as she left her heart on the stage and ripped out the hearts of those that listened to her song. People wanted to clap, they wanted to cry, they were at a bar so they ordered more drinks. Stu would make a fortune that night.
When she was finished she wiped the tears that had made their way down her face as she had been singing. She gave a quick smile to the audience before stepping down. She needed some air. She clocked out and collected her tips then went outside to breathe for a moment before remembering Lyra inside.
Tossing her apron in her locker she made her way back to where the girl sat. She had a bottle of bourbon in her hand. "Alright, tell me all about it." she said setting the bottle down.
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Post by Lyra Newbury on Jan 19, 2017 20:24:43 GMT -5
Vanessa's song hit too close to home and there was no way for Lyra to hold back the flood of tears. The girls' voice was so soulful and full of conviction, but the lyrics stung like ice cold razors blades straight into Lyra heart. But as with every other patron in the bar, Lyra couldn't bring herself to leave during such a powerful performance. She sat, crying into her arms and finishing a second glass of wine before the song was over. It was too much, she couldn't bring herself to applaud. The pain was too real and too deep.
She heard the screeching of chair legs as the seat across from her was pulled backwards and the sound of a heavy bottle being placed on the table. Lyra looked up. She didn't bother to wipe away the tears. There would soon be more.
This story, like most of her stories, was told in a roundabout manner, skipping forward and backward in time as Lyra tried to explain. Julian was a friend, not just any friend but the warmest, kindest, best friend she could have asked for. And she ruined it all. She stole everything away from him and still he was there for her. Until he wasn't.
"I just feel so lost," she said tearfully as she slide her glass back toward Vanessa to be refilled.
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Post by Vanessa VanRyan on Jan 19, 2017 22:16:40 GMT -5
Between shots and tears Vanessa learned enough from Lyra to get the gist of her relationship with Julian. She gave a soft smile.
"What made him leave?" she prodded gently.
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Post by Lyra Newbury on Jan 20, 2017 3:09:14 GMT -5
The answer to that question was infinitely more complex. She'd have to fill in a lot of bits and pieces that didn't necessarily have to do with Julian. But there was alcohol in her glass, tears in her eyes, and an emptiness in her heart. So she explained.
"Well it really all started when that serial killer, you know the one the papers are calling "M" he thought I was someone else and he tried to kidnap me and my friend Nik, oh this was before Nik and I were really friends but I was with him." Lyra glossed over the kidnapping as if it were no big deal. Dr Nadeer hated when she did that. He said it inhibited her ability to process the trauma and therefore her progress in healing would be stunted. Blah blah blah.
"Anyway, Nik fought him off but he didn't really want me anyway, M not Nik. So then Nik said I needed to learn to defend myself and he was teaching me self defense. And by this time Nik and I were friends and Julian and I weren't dating anymore but then Julian came over and he saw Nik teaching me how to get an attacker off me but I guess it looked strange to Julian and he got mad. So when I went over to his place, Julian's not Nik's, so I got to Julian's place and he's got another girl there and he said it was just a show but I didn't know that at the time and I sort of freaked out and when I went home..."
Lyra paused just long enough to take another drink and wipe away the fresh tears to make room for more. "So I guess it actually started after the kidnapping thing, but I sort of picked up a bad habit when I got anxious." Lyra found this infinitely worse than the kidnapping part of her story and avoided stating directly what her bad habit was. "And anyway so I leave Julian's house and I go home and I don't really remember but everyone said it was really bad and I ended up at the hospital. And then Julian came to see me and said he was...he said he was leaving. The whole bloody country! He can't be in the same bloody country as me!"
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Post by Vanessa VanRyan on Jan 20, 2017 3:17:11 GMT -5
Vanessa frowned, "There's only one reason you leave a country because of a person, and it isn't when you don't care about that person." she sighed taking the bottle and drinking it straight, "It's when you care too much." she said as though she had all the experience in the world, and in some way she did. She had far too much experience with love, it was the only way she could sing the way she did.
"You should sing." Vanessa nodded, "Yeah, it'll help."
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Post by Lyra Newbury on Jan 20, 2017 3:43:36 GMT -5
"Why can't he care from Scotland?" She sobbed into her arms, her forehead resting on the table once again. Her hand slid her glass forward again to be filled but she didn't look up.
Vanessa suggested she sing and Lyra shook her head no as it laid on the sticky table top. But when she picked her head up her glass was full again. "Fine" she answered numbly before taking the shot. If she went home now, whether home was to her flat down the road of Samantha's castle, she might do something foolish. But she felt better last time she sang, maybe Vanessa was right. Maybe it would help now, too.
Lyra made her way up to the stage after stopping of with the MC. Her face was red with tears and her voice cracked more than usual. She couldn't hold the longer notes but she tried anyway. It was a pathetic performance.
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Post by Vanessa VanRyan on Jan 20, 2017 3:54:23 GMT -5
The beauty of alcohol, everyone sounded much better than they were. The crowd clapped for Lyra's bravery and cheered her on. Loudest of all was Vanessa.
"That was great!" she smiled, "How do you feel?"
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Post by Lyra Newbury on Jan 20, 2017 4:00:42 GMT -5
Lyra shook her head at the question. It helped a little while she was up there. Focusing on the words that scrolled across the screen had taken her mind off her particular problem for a few minutes, but every time she hit the chorus the tears would well up and she'd remember him.
"I feel like another drink," she answered as she fell back into her chair. She didn't need to be drinking anymore, she'd had more than enough. If Julian were there he'd have scolded her for getting drunk in public without some sort of bodyguard nearby again. But he wasn't there. He wasn't anywhere she could find him.
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Post by Vanessa VanRyan on Jan 20, 2017 13:08:54 GMT -5
"Coming up." Vanessa offered. Lyra's love was out there, somewhere. He was an idiot certainly, but he was alive.
"I think he'll come back." she said after a moment. "I think real love, it lasts. Nothing can stop true love. Not even death."
She took a deep breath, "I'll be right back." she promised then left for the stage again.
Godric she missed Wes so much. She missed the way he made her feel safe and loved. He missed his fire. She missed his dancing. She had to believe that they could be together again somewhere.
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